These days, it seems like everyone is online dating. While online dating sites and apps offer men and women a chance to discover and meet people they’d never cross paths with in the “real world,” figuring out the right way to present yourself can be intimidating. Today, I want to go over five tips for writing the perfect online dating profile so you can stand out from the crowd. After all, you only get one chance to make a great first impression. The last thing you want to do is blow it before you even get a chance to say hello.
At ProfileHelper, we’re proud to be the leading online dating profile writing service for the United States, Canada, Europe, and Australia. Our professional dating coaches have helped more than 40,000 singles improve their online dating lives. From our basic profile creation services, all the way up to our Platinum Concierge service and even our online dating coach services, we can help your online dating profile stand out from the crowd. If you’re interested in learning more about our profile writing services or you have questions about how to be a more successful online dater, contact us today!
Tip #1: You are creating an Online Dating Profile, not an ad. There’s a big difference.
One of the biggest traps you, and most people, fall into when writing their dating profile is thinking you have to sell yourself, prove your value, or convince potential matches that you are worth their time. Get that idea out of your head. The moment you sound like you are trying to sell yourself, you make people wonder why people aren’t already buying. You can’t make someone want something different from what they want. Even the Genie couldn’t grant that wish for Aladdin.
Instead of thinking about your profile like an ad, think of it like you are painting a picture of your life and your world. You don’t need everyone to want to be a part of that picture. In fact, most people wouldn’t be a good fit. But, if you can show who you are through the things you love, the things that make you happy, the things that make you laugh, and other aspects of your world, you have created a real opportunity for someone to read your profile and feel a connection. Let’s look at some important things to include in your online dating profile description below!
Your Personality
While people might be interested in the things you do and your favorite band, it is your personality that makes them want to be around you. So, how do you describe your personality without listing all the things your mom told you made you special? Give examples from your life of things that show your personality. Don’t tell someone you are a hard worker; talk about why you love your job. Don’t tell people you are adventurous, tell them about your latest adventure. No one feels a connection with a list, but adding context and flavor gives them something to hook into.
Your Hobbies
What you do in your free time can say a lot about you. However, if you have a ton of hobbies, you don’t have to list them all; it makes for a boring read. Instead, pick 2-4 of them and talk about why you love them or what you do within them. It doesn’t even have to be something you are good at, just something you love. Maybe it’s a new hobby and you suck at it. That’s fine. Let them see the journey you are on, and it will make you feel more real.
Your Career or Ambitions
There is nothing wrong with talking about your job in your profile, but don’t make it the opening line. It will come off like you are trying too hard to impress. If you are going to talk about it, the important thing is to talk about why you love what you do. If you hate your job, just don’t mention it. Focus on the other parts of life you can speak to more positively. With all that said, there are a few jobs I recommend you not disclose in your profile for your own safety. They are: an anesthesiologist, a pharmacist, a mental health professional, and a police officer.
Tip #2: Let Your Photos Do The Talking
How do I make my photos sexy, alluring, mysterious? If you’re wondering these things, you’re asking the wrong question. When I’m looking at a client’s photos, I judge them by two words: Accuracy and Warmth. Do they accurately represent you in both appearance, style, and lifestyle? If not, don’t use them. If you have lost or gained weight since you took them, they aren’t accurate. If all of your photos are from weddings, they don’t accurately represent you in your normal life. If you are taking photos of yourself doing activities you don’t do in your normal life, you are selling people on a lie. People want to see the person who is going to walk through the door on the first date. If they meet you and think, “Hmm, they look different from their pics…” you’re toast.
Meanwhile, warmth is where your real value comes in. You want prospective matches to be able to look at your pics and feel like they would enjoy being around you. This means you have to smile, watch your posture, look at the camera (in posed shots), and just focus on being you.
It’s good to have between 4–6 photos in your profile, and you want to make sure they aren’t all just posed shots. Pics of you doing things you love, or from a recent trip, create an opportunity for people to ask questions. Questions are the start of a conversation, and all relationships are conversations.
Tip #3: Picking The Right Dating Site Is Half The Battle
Tip #3: Picking The Right Dating Site Is Half The BattleA great dating profile and perfect pics don’t mean anything if you are fishing in the wrong pond. There are over 10,000 dating sites and apps, and there are new ones popping up every day. If you are under 35, you are going to find your best luck on apps like Tinder, Bumble, Hinge, CMB, and Facebook Dating. Once you hit 35, you can still use those apps, but you’ll also start finding great matches on dating sites like Match and eHarmony. There are also a ton of niche sites for everything from religion and politics to hobbies and medical conditions. If you aren’t sure which dating app fits your needs the best, just reach out to me, and I’ll make sure you are heading in the right direction.
Tip #4: Work With An Online Dating Writing Service
One of the hardest things to do is to write about yourself. That is why professional authors, reporters, and screenwriters who have come to us as clients always sound a little embarrassed at first. But, think of it this way, even the greatest authors don’t write the bios on their books. They have experts for that. There are several major benefits to using a profile writing service. They can bring an objective approach to your profile that focuses on your goals, and not what other people think you need, they can help you get out of your own way, they can stop you from wasting time and money with a bad first impression that kills opportunity, and they can help you get set up with a profile and online dating strategy that makes online dating easier and more efficient. Online dating should not feel like a second job. If you are doing it right and presenting yourself well, it shouldn’t take up more than 5–15 minutes of your day.
*A quick note about AI – A lot of people have started trying to use AI to write their dating profiles. In a lot of cases, you’ll get something that is better than you can do on your own, but that doesn’t make it good. AI creates a product designed to be acceptable to the largest audience. That means the profile they write for you will be OK for everyone, but special to no one. It cannot dive deeper into topics that an experienced writer knows could be great in your profile, and it lacks the wisdom to know that some of the things you tell it do not belong in a profile. AI is great for a lot of things, but there are some things where humanity is still really important.
Tip #5: Don’t Be Too Shy To Message Someone First
While Tinder and Bumble rely on an extremely toxic mutual swipe mechanic, most dating sites and apps give you the ability to reach out and make first contact. Don’t waste the opportunity. There is no one out there who knows what you want more than you. More importantly, there is no one out there who cares about what you want more than you do.
This doesn’t mean you message everyone you think is hot. Attraction is important, but it shouldn’t ever be the reason you message someone. It should only be the reason you read their profile. When you connect with someone through their profile, reach out and start a conversation. Otherwise, you’ll just be another online dater complaining that they only get messages from people they don’t want to meet. After all, if you aren’t willing to make the first move, you only get to choose from the people who message you. That cuts your chance of finding a great relationship in half!
If you’d like help creating a great new profile, check out our dating profile writing services. However, if you have a question or aren’t sure how to get started, call me at 888-447-7634, or send me a message on our contact page today!
